Everywhere But Right in Front

 “Life can only be understood backwards, but it must be lived forward.” –Soren Kierkegaard

Better yet, life must be lived in the NOW. The past does not exist, and the future does not exist. Both are mental constructs that are used to envision and describe states of being other than the NOW. They are illusions. Neither can be sensed in the present moment. They can only be glimpsed in their ephemeral, nebulous form. In focusing forward or backward, we deny what is right in front of us, what IS.

Fixation on past and future imply that both or either are better than living in the present moment, the NOW. How can that possibly be?  Fantasy is better than reality?  I cannot fathom this.  Yet, I fall into the trap all the time.  The possibility of what may come can never be more glorious than the here and NOW.  The memory of what was or could have been can never be more delicious that the experience of the present moment.

I had this very conversation with my oldest son the other day.  He soaked in the concept.  He had been angry at himself for messing around too much with a friend of his at school.  They had been warned, but they could not “help but keep talking with each other.”  So, they were separated.  My son was beside himself.  It had ruined his day.  He told me, “I’m so mad at myself for not listening to Mrs.Smith.”  He paused, then asked, “Dad, what was the Universe trying to teach me today?”  

Great question.  I thought for a moment.  I responded, “Perhaps the Universe is trying to teach you to not beat yourself up for something that has already happened and cannot be changed.  You are missing out on this time with your family because you are thinking about what is already done and allowing it to poison the present moment.”

He considered that.

I added, “When you are at school tomorrow, make sure you are present enough to think about how you want to spend your day with your friends.”  

He smiled.  “Thanks, Dad,” he said.  “I think that helps a lot.”

By our very human nature, we contemplate the past and plan for the future.  We always do so at the expense of the moment.  The best times of our lives are not the moments we spent remembering other moments.  The best times are those for which we were fully present.  That’s ironic, isn’t it?  Consider that we might have more memories if we just stopped remembering so much.  And if we spent less time looking forward to things that may or may not happen tomorrow, we might find that cool things are happening right now.

We miss out on a lot when we look everywhere but right in front of us.