You learn a lot about what people really think about you when the stuff hits the fan in their lives. What they look to you to provide to them when times are tough provides clue to what they really think about you. Can you discern what matters most to them: the relationship or the transactional value you provide? Do they turn to you for support, advice, guidance, or a long, warm hug? Or do they turn to you for a business lead, a loan, or backup in a confrontation? There is plenty to learn in how others treat you. Sounds like common sense, but emotion often keeps us from seeing the truth.
Don’t judge the answers to these questions, and don’t judge the person. Just use those moments to help you better comprehend where you fit into their world view. With eyes more widely-opened, you can mold the relationship to either meet their expectations or yours. Chances are, making it fit your expectations will take more energy and work, focused intentionally on the outcomes you want. Just remember that your intention doesn’t guarantee success. Or happiness.
Illuminate Possibilities 