I think the flaw in the way we learn and teach empathy is that we emphasize putting ourselves in another’s place. By imagining ourselves in the other person’s life, we immediately guarantee an alien experience. How could it not be? We are not that other person, and they are not us. I mean, we are, but that’s another discussion altogether. The point is that it is an impossible task to attempt to assume the identity of another in the hope that doing so will breed understanding. It won’t, at least not in the way intended by empathy.
Instead, I think the far less distracting path to empathy lies in understanding another by attempting to truly understand them. Listen. Listen far more than speak, and I think you’re on the right path. I cannot think of a better way to gain empathy than by allowing the other to tell their story.
Don’t imagine; listen. I think that is how to find understanding by understanding.
Illuminate Possibilities 