Who Has Your Back?

Who has your back?

The answer: nobody.

Nobody has your back. Need examples? I’ve got some scenarios. How about broken promises from managers who ran out the door so fast chasing their own agenda that they couldn’t even apologize to you to your face for failing to come through for you? How about your contributions for the better part of the year going unrecognized because of a 3rd-Quarter change in assignment? How about the guy in HR who chooses to ignore your attempts at communicating with him for months, only to weigh in at the 11th hour to let you know that he doesn’t really support what you’re doing?

Do you need more hypothetical examples? Probably not, huh? You’re already making your own list…

Here’s the thing: nobody should have to cover your back. I can think of few professions and few situations where you actually need someone to have your back. Even then, whatever threatens you in the situation is probably threatening the other person, too. Like in the military, for example. The RPG can take you all out. Law enforcement? A well-placed bullet can take your backup out. Firefighting? It’s fire, for Pete’s sake! That stuff burns without prejudice. No, you cannot and should not ever rely on someone else to have your back.

See, that’s what makes having someone else’s back such a gift. It’s a gift you give others because you know it’s the right thing to do. Some times you sacrifice…big…to be there for another person. You do it without expecting anything in return. You do it because you care. It is that simple.

It is that simple for others, too. People will undoubtedly, inevitably come to your defense, to your rescue. Your world is filled with reliable friends, trustworthy colleagues, and compassionate bosses. It is just easy to overlook them and focus on the recent, intense negative feelings. It’s hard to hunker down and let the wave of misfortune wash over you. If you just have patience and keep your eyes and ears attuned, when the wave retreats, you’ll find yourself in a position to appreciate and give thanks for all the people who are covering your back in the ways that matter.

Need examples? How about the friends who give without expecting anything in return? Or the family that supports you every step of the way? Or the colleague who takes walks with you and lets you vent? Or the confidant who lets you spill your guts without showing any sign of judgment?

Do you need more hypothetical examples? Probably not, huh? I hope you’re already making your own list…