Compromise…

Compromise can be a vicious thing. When I say “compromise,” I mean the word in the sense of the third definition I found at www.thefreedictionary.com/compromise: a concession to something detrimental (causing damage or harm) or pejorative (tending to make or become worse).

Sometimes, compromise is simply about concessions. In a professional setting, we are often called upon to make concessions in an effort to strike a balance between the needs and desires of various parties involved in an interaction, be it positive or negative. Compromise doesn’t have to be a bad thing. Sure, it might mean you can’t have everything you wanted, but…you know…most of the time you can live with giving something up here and there.

But there are times when compromise is all about the detrimental and pejorative stuff. Life takes on a bitter flavor when we find ourselves in situations where the kind of compromise we are making strikes at the heart of what we believe to be right and true. It’s even worse when we accept the compromise out of a desire to not rock the boat, out of a desire to reach a specific goal that would otherwise be endangered without the compromise. Being in that position doesn’t feel good.

Don’t ask someone else to compromise more than you yourself are willing to sacrifice. It’s easy to pretend that we’re giving up as much as the other person to convince them that the compromise is fair, but…you still have to look at yourself in the mirror afterwards, you know? You can’t lie to yourself. I mean, you can try. It just catches up with you. You may not feel it immediately, but the little lies add up. They take their toll. Some day, you’ll regret it.