Stay Inside the Box

I do not like being placed in a box. I know that someday, I will be placed in a wooden box and lowered 6 feet under. That is the only box that I can accept in my future. Although, it would be far more ecologically sound to just grind me up and mix me into some topsoil. Not compost, mind you, because you’re supposed to leave the meaty, smelly parts out of that. It would be more like real worm food.

Anyway, no boxing me in, please. I don’t like it. I don’t want it. I don’t like to put people into boxes. I recognize that I am human, and, as such, will occasionally default to placing people into boxes unwittingly. Well, there’s also emotionally putting people into boxes. You know, setting up boundaries such that you can avoid creating uncomfortably, potentially ugly conflicts. That’s a different kind of box; it’s the kind that protects you and everyone else involved.

No, the kind of box that I am talking about is the oppressive, restrictive kind. I doubt I am alone in not wanting someone to marginalize me and demand that I conform to the parameters of the box. I don’t like that. And, like I said, I doubt most people do. We say that it’s good to think outside the box, but when we think outside the box in ways that make other people uncomfortable because it’s non-normative, then we come to realize that a lot of other people really don’t want you thinking outside of the box. What they really want is for you to think outside of the box you put yourself into but still stay inside the box THEY put you into.

Does that make sense?

Here’s what I am saying: I will think outside of any and every damn box I wish. I don’t care if it’s my box, your box, his box, her box…I don’t care if it’s the Pope’s box. As my wife has been known to say, “The job of all parents is to set boundaries for their children. The job of all children is to push those boundaries. Wise woman. I’m down with that, sweetheart. You’ve never accused me of being overly grown up.

Don’t get me wrong: I’ll respect anyone’s personal boundary. You have a right to protect yourself from me, if that’s what you feel you need to do. I’m mostly harmless, but I’ve been known to piss off, offend, and alienate all kinds of people. So, feel free to put a box around yourself to keep me out. Just don’t ask me to stay in a box to keep the status quo all comfy and happy.

I won’t stay inside the box.