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- January 19th, 2009
A very dear friend of mine used to be a Buddhist monk. He has a family now and has worked at more than one Fortune 100 company. Seriously. He’s a former Buddhist monk who manages IT at a Fortune 100 company.
We have this regular debate that goes something like this:
“See that guy who just fell down? That was his Destiny.”
“Or,” I retort, “he just made a bad choice walking on the icy sidewalk.”
“There is only Fate and Destiny.”
“We co-create our existence through the choices we make.” Details might change, but the conversation is pretty much the same each time. It’s boring to the outside observer, I am sure. For every zinger he shoots my way, I’ve got a one-liner to fling back. He is a pretty good debater, but I am, too. So, neither of us gives. We’re not stubborn. We simply have an opinion, and the rationale of the other, while sound, is fundamentally unconvincing. Why does this disagreement matter? In the end, it doesn’t. Some day, we’ll both be dead, and the argument will mean nothing to us. Another duo somewhere will undoubtedly have taken up the thread. In my life, what does matter is how I respond to the Universe. Therein lies the real choice that I think matters most. Some people swear by “The Secret” and the “Law of Attraction.” I don’t know how far I would take it, personally, but I believe that I have the power and the ability to, at minimum, heavily influence my future by the choices I make today. From what I wear to how I save for retirement to how I treat the driver of the car trying to merge into traffic in front of me, I believe that my choices shape my tomorrows. Belief in choice works for me. I believe, given a chance, it can work for anyone. I am not saying that I have all the answers or that I can choose my way into millions of dollars at the drop of a hat. What I am saying is that I fundamentally believe in my ability to mold my future. If I fail to do so, it is precisely because I fail to do so. I fail to do so. I. I fail. By the choices I make. Even if I sabotage my own happiness, for example, I do it to myself. I meditate on this idea often, almost daily. I offer this for consideration: what is the harm in opening yourself up to the belief that you can, at minimum, influence the shape of your future. Choose a new attitude. Choose to give others the benefit of the doubt. Choose to believe in yourself. Choose to believe that you deserve to be loved. Choose to give of yourself in a way that does not require you to expect anything in return. Choose to make a change that will alter the path you have taken. All these things around us that we fear disrupting will become disrupted at a moment’s notice, whether we choose or not. My friend the Buddhist Monk would say that Fate chose the victims of Hurricane Katrina. Whether he’s right or wrong, the end result was the same. To me, that’s some heavy stuff. Think about it for a while. It’s easy to sit here and wax philosophical. It isn’t so easy to apply fanciful philosophy to your actual existence. Try it out; take a baby step. Choose one thing to change and believe in that choice. Have Faith. Fate or choice: in the end, what difference does it make?
“Or,” I retort, “he just made a bad choice walking on the icy sidewalk.”
“There is only Fate and Destiny.”
“We co-create our existence through the choices we make.” Details might change, but the conversation is pretty much the same each time. It’s boring to the outside observer, I am sure. For every zinger he shoots my way, I’ve got a one-liner to fling back. He is a pretty good debater, but I am, too. So, neither of us gives. We’re not stubborn. We simply have an opinion, and the rationale of the other, while sound, is fundamentally unconvincing. Why does this disagreement matter? In the end, it doesn’t. Some day, we’ll both be dead, and the argument will mean nothing to us. Another duo somewhere will undoubtedly have taken up the thread. In my life, what does matter is how I respond to the Universe. Therein lies the real choice that I think matters most. Some people swear by “The Secret” and the “Law of Attraction.” I don’t know how far I would take it, personally, but I believe that I have the power and the ability to, at minimum, heavily influence my future by the choices I make today. From what I wear to how I save for retirement to how I treat the driver of the car trying to merge into traffic in front of me, I believe that my choices shape my tomorrows. Belief in choice works for me. I believe, given a chance, it can work for anyone. I am not saying that I have all the answers or that I can choose my way into millions of dollars at the drop of a hat. What I am saying is that I fundamentally believe in my ability to mold my future. If I fail to do so, it is precisely because I fail to do so. I fail to do so. I. I fail. By the choices I make. Even if I sabotage my own happiness, for example, I do it to myself. I meditate on this idea often, almost daily. I offer this for consideration: what is the harm in opening yourself up to the belief that you can, at minimum, influence the shape of your future. Choose a new attitude. Choose to give others the benefit of the doubt. Choose to believe in yourself. Choose to believe that you deserve to be loved. Choose to give of yourself in a way that does not require you to expect anything in return. Choose to make a change that will alter the path you have taken. All these things around us that we fear disrupting will become disrupted at a moment’s notice, whether we choose or not. My friend the Buddhist Monk would say that Fate chose the victims of Hurricane Katrina. Whether he’s right or wrong, the end result was the same. To me, that’s some heavy stuff. Think about it for a while. It’s easy to sit here and wax philosophical. It isn’t so easy to apply fanciful philosophy to your actual existence. Try it out; take a baby step. Choose one thing to change and believe in that choice. Have Faith. Fate or choice: in the end, what difference does it make?
Illuminate Possibilities 